Wednesday, August 23, 2006


Please Pray for Anna!!!

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

I just can't help myself!

I am working at "Afternoon's At Augustine", I spend a couple of hours with a bunch of kids each day and get paid to do's great! I keep being amazed at the crazy things that they say and do...and think that they can get away with. I have been trying to remember if when I was eight I thought adults were deaf and stupid because the kids act like I am both. I can't tell you how many times just today that I caught a child goofing off during homework time, asked them if they had finished their homework, gotten an affirmative answer, then when I ask them to see it- all of their work suddenly becomes undone and they have to finish that last math page. It's like magic!

Here are some funny things the kids at school have said and done:

(context: Out on the playgroud)
I am sitting watching them play when one of the third grade boys comes and stands next to me and says, "I just can't help myself!" I said, "What do you mean?" He replied, "I just keep pickin up rocks and throwing them and pickin up sticks and hittin them at people!" I said, "maybe you should sit out for a while." He answered, "yah, I think I do!"

(context: Beth's office)
Beth and I walk into her office to find her five year old son in front of about eight orange plastic safety cones all placed randomly (or so we first thought) beside her desk. Also, a sprite can with apparent scissor laserations was sitting on the edge of the desk. 'A crime scene', I thought. When he noticed our arrival he announced to us with his hands over the cones and a firm expression on his face, "There is wet!" I had to leave the room so I wouldn't laugh out loud as Beth began her questioning.

(context: a moment of chaos)
On a whim and for lack of better entertainment for a group of stir crazy kids, I handed out one crayon and a piece of paper to each child and told them to think of things that are the color of the crayon I gave them and draw those things. One little boy got purple...I didn't notice until later but he drew the one eyed, one horned, flying purple people eater!

(context: an inclassroom discussion around some serious coloring)
Second grader: "Miss Heidi, how is Mrs. Cullum's baby going to get out of her?"
Another second grader: "Out through her shoulder, duh!"
I decided to let their parents deal with that one...

More to come!!!

Monday, August 21, 2006

Single yearnings

Sometimes I struggle with being single. I want to be married, I desire that companionship, children, my own home to keep. But most of the time, I am content, even joyful that I have this time of singleness. I have an abundance of time and therefore opportunities to serve others as a single women. I enjoy going into the homes of my sweet friends, tending to their children, making them dinner, and often sharing company with them, my 'married' friends. And I leave those special times with a full heart, and often more of an idea of how I would like my future husband to treat me and my children. But lately it has been more difficult. Although I can blame it on a number of things like the many comments and well meaning 'nudges' that I recieve from my (married) sisters in Christ, it all comes down to my heart and what I let myself dwell on at the end of the day. I need to be more intentional about thinking on today, what God has blessed me with NOW, and how He can and wants to use me (despite my shortcomings). It's just so easy for my desire to turn into an aching 'need' and for my yearning heart to turn into a jealose hurt.
So I don't feel like this is the best blog I have ever writin but it is what is on my heart so I am sharing...let me know your thoughts!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Peace and quiet in my mouth...

Tonight I am spending the evening with Maggie and Chris...right now they are 'discussing' who gets which chocolate, each of the chocolates are a different shape and you know each shape tastes different even if they are made out of the same stuff. Chris said something funny a couple of minutes ago, it was an oddly silent few minutes at the dinner table when I commented on how they were being very quiet this evening. Maggie said something about when they aren't around other kids they are quiet...ya right. Then Chris replied, "It's not peace and quiet in my mouth!"...he is eating Captain Crunch for dinner...what a funny kid. Anyway, it made me think. How often do I appear as though things are peaceful and quiet in my heart when really emotions and thoughts are whirling out of control in there?! The answer is often. Mostly because I usually am in a situation where I feel it is the most appropriate to keep my mouth shut but also because I am so prideful. Even when I am with the people who I am closest to, I most often don't share the things that are raging war on my heart when I should. And I realize that it is because I don't want to be vulnerable, I don't want to be a burden and I like to look as though I have everything together...especially when I don't. But it is always freeing and growing when I take the extra step and put forth that extra energy to share my burdens...remind me of that when you think I need to hear it ok!
So a word to the proud like myself...get over it and let the people who love you know how they can be there for you or at least let them know when it's not peace and quiet in your heart. Even if they can't do anything about it, they can pray.

p.s. no one got any chocolate

Monday, August 7, 2006

My sins, in perspective

I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed to us. Romans 8:8

There is an amazing power to being still. This Saturday I was doing a job that forces you to be still and quiet for three, two hour periods. For the day I brought a book to read, my Bible and a notebook. It's been a while since I have been able to just sit and read and think for this many hours at a time...what a blessing it was! I began reading in Romans 8, then realized a connection that I have never noticed before...Romans 8 comes right after Romans 7! Yes, obvious I know but Romans 7 is all about struggling with sin..."For when we were controlled by the sinful nature(flesh), the sinful passions aroused by the law were at work in our bodies, so that we bore fruit for death. But now, by dying to what once bound us, we have been released from the law so that we serve in the new way of the spirit." Romans 7:5-6 THEN Romans 8 begins with the great, "Therefore, there is now no condemnations for those who are in Christ Jesus..."!!! It is the message of salvation that is seen throughout the Word but written in a way that gives me a new perspective on more than just my sin. Romans 8:5-8 says, "but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of the sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace." What a great reminder to me that when I sin, it is, in part, because my mind is not set on what the Spirit desires! (1)
To grasp the glory of God is impossible by through reading these chapters my heart is encouraged and rests knowing that in comparison to the glory I will see when I meet Jesus- this present suffering in nothing. On a day like today, why my heart is heavy and I am SO weary of this world. It is good to find the perspective of Romans 8, it comforts me and I find while reading it that all these things going on are important but in the grand scheme of things they just don't matter that much. These hardships are bringing me closer to God-what a sweet, sweet blessing. There is nothing greater that experiencing God drawing me closer to Him, truly knowing that I am part of His sonship-while that may bring suffering, I praise Him and thank Him for it because I desire to be drawn closer to Him-whatever it takes. It's been a difficult decade but now, walking in obedience I have the Savior or the world backing me up. The king who will crush His enemies, who is just and full of compassion. He is the one I depend on and rest in His presence.

"For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you receive the Spirit of sonship (or adoption). And by him we cry "Abba, Father."...The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children..."

(1) Go hear for a great sermon in Psalms